Flying Yogi

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
moroswin
flyingyogi

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I support and adore my transgender friends and family. Today as we remember the lives taken in hate and violence, I commit to being a place of safety, a listening ear, and a source of unconditional acceptance for all of the beautiful transgender people in my life.


To that end, I also maintain a public commitment to tolerate zero transphobia on my Facebook or any other social media. I don’t care what our relationship is, discrimination and harmful “opinions“ about the valid experiences of transgender individuals will get you an immediate block.


The lives and the safety of the transgender people I love are more important to me than the comfort of those who would dehumanize them.

moroswin

Hey guess what I found out about myself about a year after I made this post.

guardianofscrewingup
methsnake

imagine if the oceans were replaced by forests and if you went into the forest the trees would get taller the deeper you went and there’d be thousands of undiscovered species and you could effectively walk across the ocean but the deeper you went, the darker it would be and the animals would get progressively scarier and more dangerous and instead of whales there’d be giant deer and just wow

radglawr

you have a beautiful imagination

iguanamouth

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cultofplush

this gave me chills

lifeofcynch

HOLY SHIT

weasowl

first of all ^^^ I love this^^^

secondly, I’ve said it before, but 

this is exactly what the Old World was. Off shore there was Ocean, and inland there was Forrest

Here’s an Old World tree still surviving in a modern forrest of “large” trees

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That’s just what trees used to be like.

And wandering among those trees, one might have encountered, yes, deer larger than a modern moose, but also, depending on what year, pigs bigger than grizzly bears, beavers the size of modern wolves, ground sloths the size of modern elephants, and bears nearly that big. Not to mention the insects and snakes and shit.

I could keep going, like, you might have crossed paths with a whole herd of these

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or a family of these.

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Like, 29,000 years ago, the last of the Neanderthal had just died out. Humans and this thing definitely lived at the same time.

And they didn’t live in the Forest, but there is one ice age creature that’s still alive, if you want to see what life was like back in the day. We used to think the Musk Ox was a type of bovine, or cow, which is how it got it’s name. BUT. See this?

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that, my friends, is an ice age GOAT. That’s right, that’s a 900 pound GOAT. Here, take another look

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anyway, yeah, the wild used to be a lot more Wild. Old Forest was definitely the inland equivalent of Ocean, and everything back in the day was turnt the fuck UP

theclockistickingwrite
hacash

so in the hobbit when offered a cup of chamomile tea by dori, gandalf instead asks for wine; but when offered a glass of ‘the old winyards’ by bilbo in lotr, gandalf instead asks for tea. from this we can draw one of two conclusions:

a: hanging around thorin oakenshield was enough to turn gandalf to drink

or

b: getting to know a recklessly be-tooked bilbo baggins was enough to make gandalf reconsider his life and realise he needed to be the sensible and sober one

butim-justharry

c: gandalf just likes to be contrary and will never accept whatever is specifically offered

systlin

It is 7000% option C. 

zombiefaepunk
tanoraqui

that theory that the Arkenstone is a Silmaril…it’s doubly implausible, but imagine if nobody knew. If the dwarves were guarded enough of their greatest treasure that…you wouldn’t even need to hide it from that many people, honestly. Mostly a few elves, and all wizards.

and then Bilbo sidles up to Gandalf like, “Thorin and all are holed up in the Mountain, but I think they’re being nuts, so I…kind of stole the Arkenstone, I think.” And (it’s been thousands of years since the light of the trees was doused save for the precious brilliance locked away in Feanor’s gems, since oaths and blood and war that raged until the skies cracked and the earth shattered, and the little people of the Shire have no memory of it at all) he pulls out a fucking Silmaril.

tanoraqui

Gandalf: *spittake*

Gandalf: *hurriedly glances at Thranduil. the king of Mirkwood’s eyes shine with curiosity and greed, but not recognition, nor the terrible lust that overtook Feanor and his sons. right, right, he was never in Thingol’s court while the jewel that Luthien and Beren took was there. we’re good. we’re good for now*

Gandalf: That’s, uh, nice, Bilbo. Put it away, would you?

tanoraqui

Gandalf, telepathically(?): EMERGENCY RINGBEARERS ONLY CONFAB NOW

Gandalf: [mental image of a goddam Silmaril in hobbit hands, labelled “thisfuckingrockagain.jpg”]

Galadriel, who watched 95% of her family slaughter everyone within 100 miles for several thousand years over these things, including each other and themselves: no.

Elrond, who was very nearly one of those people slaughtered, and did watch most of his town be killed before he and his twin were kidnapped for a while: Absolutely Fucking Not.

Gandalf: Apparently fucking yes. The legendary Arkenstone-

Galadriel: You’ve got to be kidding me.

Elrond: Thorin Oakenshield has a Silmaril right now?

Gandalf: No, no.

Gandalf: Bilbo stole it.

Elrond: *wordless sputtering*

Gandalf: @Galadriel [information packet: BilboBagginsoftheShire.pdf]

Galadriel: Oh yes, Belladonna’s boy, you were telling me about him last winter. 

Galadriel: Btw, orc+warg army probably coming your way. Spotted it in the mirror last night. Thank goodness we dealt with Dol Goldur at least, huh?

Elrond: No fucking shit.

tanoraqui

Gandalf @Gwaihir Windlord: hey, sorry to bother you again, I know it’s nearly mating season. but we have a situation again

Gandalf: [thisfuckingrockagain.jpg]

Gandalf: [oncomingorcwargarmy.jpg]

Gandalf: [flashbacktobadasseaglesinwarofwrathhinthint.mov]

avelera

I mean, given that Tolkien retconned “The Hobbit” so Bilbo’s little invisibility ring became an ancient piece of jewelry that controls minds and drives the mighty mad, one can at least understand why it seems plausible that the other shiny white gem that destroys empires and makes the mighty go mad with greed could be linked from his kid’s book to his gigantic early mythology in retrospect??

crazy-pages

You know this actually explains a lot about why Gandalf didn’t immediately raise the alarm about Bilbo’s ring out of an abundance of caution.

I mean, what are the odds, what are the fucking odds, that this one little hobbit stole both a Silmaril and the Ring of Power? Like, you are Gandalf the Grey and you have already dealt with the heart attack to end all heart attacks because this little innocent fool stole a world war inspiring artifact once. You still get flashbacks every time Bilbo offers to show you something and have to employ all of your angel’s serenity and thousands of years of learned composure not start giBbERinG “ pleaseletitnotbeanotherartifactpleaseletitnotbeanotherartifact”.

And then. AND THEN! One day he’s like, “hey Gandalf let me show you this neat ring I found back on our journey”. And on the inside a tiny part of you is screaming “nottheoneringnottheoneringnottheonering” while a more rational part of your brain assures you it could not possibly be the one-

“It’s this plain gold ring that’s very precious to me and turns me invisible!”

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AND THEN YOU FUCK OFF AND SEARCH THROUGH EVERY POSSIBLE TOME YOU CAN TO PROVE IT CAN’T REALLY BE THE RING OF POWER, SAURON’S RING OF POWER, THAT RING, THE ONE RING, LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE TOME, BEFORE FINALLY FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGING THAT THIS SHIT IS REALLY HAPPENING AGAIN

countesskittymeow

@shewhodoesnotexist what says you? :P

shewhodoesnotexist

I’ve never been a proponent of this theory, but I gotta admit the idea of Bilbo finding two world war inspiring artifacts is alluring ;D

Next you’ll be telling me Sting is Gurthang

rrrush

Sting may or may not be Angrist, the knife that Beren used to get the Silmarill off of Morgoth’s crown

rhofanficreadergamerdreamer

Somewhere J.R.R. Tolkien is standing on a pier, looks up from his smartphone and over his shoulder at we who are left behind, a misty look in his eye. Starts walking toward an elven ship to make his way to the grey havens … throws his phone into the sea and the last words we hear from him, “About fucking time…”